I nearly got laid 3 weeks ago. There’s a girl I kinda like (not the one I’m in love with and desperately trying to get over) and I know she likes me too.
Her other half was out of town for a week and she invited me over for dinner one day. We had a really good time, got really drunk, went out, got more drunk, staggered home and she wanted to fuck. But she was more drunk than I was. No hope at keeping eye contact, and she fell off the bed twice. So after a really long, drawn out and quite agonizing turning her down and putting her to bed I left and staggered home like a slow motion pinball.
I found out later she rang another friend the next night and he didn’t turn her down. She really didn’t care how drunk she got, she just wanted a fuck. I did the “right thing” and didn’t get laid for nothing. But if I had done it, I’d have felt horrible.
I live in a morally bankrupt world where I’m gonna hate myself for doing something I want as much as I’m gonna hate myself for not doing it. I can’t win.