I’m supposed to be seeing my friend (The Girl I Can Never Have) tomorrow, as we agreed on the phone yesterday. Haven’t heard a peep from her today, so texted to make sure things were still okay for tomorrow.
At time of writing, it’s been 50 minutes and nothing. Years of experience and low self esteem have trained me to expect a rejection when I double-check plans with anyone. I hate this waiting to hear back period so much.
Worse still, I’m afraid she’ll just not reply. I’d so much prefer a simple “Sorry I can’t” or some other polite rejection 5 seconds after I texted and at least know where I stand.
Most annoying of all, when we reconnected she made a point to say she’d *always* text me back when she could, no matter what. Hasn’t quite panned out.
But who knows, maybe her man is balls-deep in her right now, or her phone’s charging in the corner or her baby’s raising hell. More likely (says the paranoid mind with zero anything to back it up) though, she saw my message, swiped it off the screen and went right back to texting her other friends…
I wish I knew what was paranoia and what was truth.
UPDATE: She texted back at 1am, and I spent 4 or 5 hours with her today. She’s had a very difficult couple of days, the details of which I won’t go into but are more than reason enough to excuse late replies.